When erectile dysfunction strikes

When erectile dysfunction besets a man, the first and immediate effect is poor sexual performance, which expectedly produces feelings of shame, frustration, and anger. Poor sexual performance can create significant emotional turmoil in the man, fueling a sense of failure in the man and frustration in the woman.

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Men’s inadequacy in bed and its general management has been a big challenge for most couples over the years. Failure of a man in this vital aspect of the union can devastate marital relationship, and could even lead a woman into adultery – as a way of obtaining sexual satisfaction. For some women who desire to maintain a chaste status and disposition, their husband’s inability to perform their conjugal duty leaves them pining away in silence. Without a doubt, manifest poor performance or clear inability to perform conjugal duty is a major factor that humbles a man.

Now the big question is: what should a woman eager for sexual satisfaction do in a situation where the husband is unable to engage in sexual intercourse on account of erectile dysfunction or poor sexual performance. Straight and direct to the point, cheating on your husband is not the solution.

A fundamental key to finding solution is open and frank communication between the couple, and of course the intervention and support of the Spirit of God, to facilitate the healing process. Believing in God’s power can offer hope and guidance, particularly when dealing with issues that affect the relationship emotionally and physically. 

Research has proved that erectile dysfunction varies. Sexual inadequacies can differ from one person to another. Some men may be physically unable to perform due to health issues, while others might experience temporary struggles despite strong desire for sexual intercourse. Another factor could be a feeling inadequacy over the supposed small size of the man’s organ. But should not be as not all men are blessed with good sizeable organs even though big size does not guarantee satisfaction.

It is very to note that satisfaction is not solely dependent on physical traits. Instead, bonding, communication and mutual understanding are contributory factors.

On the other hand, a man could be very active and sexually smart but does not produce healthy sperm cells that can impregnate a woman. With proper treatment a man with erectile dysfunction and healthy sperm can sustain erection long enough to strike  can strike and score a goal that would be magical.

Most important is the fact that some men come naturally poor in sexual exploits no matter how hard his woman tries to fix it. Well, it has led to a lot of inner relationships damage.

Again, some victims of poor performances refuse to open up to their doctors and psychologists. When they do, one discovers, it might be a very simple therapy that will take care of the problem. It will be heavenly to discuss this problem with their partners and seek for the solution together. Both should see a medical doctor and a psychologist together and not at different times. So also, should they take their medications and indulge in healthy lifestyle together. It is so heart breaking when two who should scream out and climax together in oil rig exploration shy away from each other, it means they do not have plans to resolve their sexual problem. For not opening up, Mrs. James (not real name) said: “My husband refuses to join me see our medical team together. Whenever I go for check-up, the result will show that my poor-performing husband had sexually infected me. It got so bad the doctor warned that if he did not come, he would not be wasting his time treating me.”

Medically, there have been cases when doctors teach or introduce a vacuum pump that creates a pumping sensation, this generates the blood flow needed for the erection. Both should be together to learn and apply the method on themselves. The essence of seeing medical practitioners and psychologists together might not necessarily be for medical treatment but to also teach on how to create some fun in the other room without penetration.

Interestingly, exploring non-penetrative forms of intimacy like foreplay or manual stimulation can provide a way for couples to reconnect and enjoy each other’s company without the pressure of performance. It will be right for couples to focus on pleasure rather than achieving specific outcomes, like pregnancy or perfect intercourse, and experiment to find what brings joy to both partners.

Again, at a time in a man’s life, he might be battling health challenges that affects his engine room without knowing it. A man could be very active as a young fellow but decline with age. If both the couple begin to observe frequent use of the bathroom, taking time to emptying his bladder or producing less semen, gaining unnecessary weight, changes to his physique, there is need to run to a health care provider because a number of common sexual and reproductive health condition can develop at any stage and age of a man. Such a man might need his woman to encourage him with kind words for emotional healing while he gets effective treatment.

Recounting the testimony off a dear sister, though not promoting promiscuity, a very close sister who spoke anonymously said, her case became different when she tasted the Adam’s apple. “My husband and I met as young Christian lovers on Campus. We were also virgins as at that time but took our relationship to the next level and tied the nuptial after our graduation. Initially, with my husband’s poor erectile dysfunction, I thought that was what sex was all about. We did not bother to seek for medical help due to our religious predispositions. With Christian naivety, I did not also realize how I needed a strong man to take care of my high libido. We managed the situation prayerfully and otherwise and had a child after four years. Then, I became gainfully employed as a secretary in one of the top financial institutions. My boss would admire me all day, pay me compliments, buy me expensive gifts. I would get home to tell my husband that my boss was so nice to me. Then, it was during my bosses’ mother’s burial that my eyes were opened. He had arranged that I get into town early to organize and prepare for our staff who would visit the next day. As soon as I arrived at the airport, he drove me to the hotel and before I could say jack, he played a hot romantic move and I melted in his arms. Surprisingly, we had sex and he gave it to me satisfactorily. It was hotter than fire. I realized something different. It was stronger, fuller, more satisfying and more enjoyable to say the least. From that experience, my eyes were open and power changed hand automatically even with my Christian faith. Never knew what I was missing for years and it was not too long I left my husband. My boss rented an apartment for me. From then on, I enjoyed sex satisfactorily with two children to attest to it.   

In conclusion, regular, satisfying sexual intimacy is a vital part of a healthy marriage. It contributes to emotional and spiritual bonding. Couples who maintain a fulfilling sex life are generally happier, while lack of intimacy can strain relationships. Even when sexual expectations are not fully met, focusing on connection and emotional intimacy is essential. In relationships and marriages where one partner is facing sexual challenges, open communication and mutual support are essential. Also seeking professional help, addressing emotional and physical needs, and maintaining trust can help couples navigate difficulties and strengthen their bond.