Hubby left for a richer older woman: what is your take on this?

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Dear Bunmi,

MY husband was the love of my life and I thought we would grow old together. I did everything for him for the 12 years of our marriage and made our marriage as comfortable and happy as I possibly could. Then I started hearing tales of him being around an older woman who ran a chain of restaurants. When I confronted him, he denied everything, saying his family was more important to him.

Then without warning, he simply moved in with this woman. He had lost his job and that was his way of rising above the economic depression he was in. He had the nerve to tell me we would both benefit from his decision ~ our two kids would want for nothing. If this woman had been a young gold-digger, maybe I would have coped.

But I felt so used and humiliated he’d chosen money over his family. This happened over a year ago but I’m still hurting.

Orode, by e-mail.

Dear Orode,

You need the support of family and friends through a betrayal like this to remind you that even when you’re in the depths of despair, you have a lot of things to be grateful for. The classic song, which is more or less the anthem of the heartbroken ‘I Will Survive’ is so appropriate for women like you – and will give you strength and hope that it’s never too late to embrace life and start again.

Force your elf to look forwards. Take positive action – start something difference and make it your life from now on. The kids need you more now they have the attention of just one parent. Don’t turn them against their dad but don’t leave room for him to get under your skin ever again.


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